Spooky & Funny Halloween Jokes for Kids

Get ready for some spooky giggles and ghostly guffaws! Our Halloween joke collection is packed with monster mash-ups, eerie puns, and just the right amount of frightful fun to keep kids howling with laughter. Perfect for Halloween parties, trick-or-treat nights, or just adding a little extra boo to your day!

  1. Q: What has wings, feathers, and fangs?
    A: Count Duckula.
  2. Q: Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
    A: He had no body to go with!
  3. Q: Why do ghosts make great cheerleaders?
    A: They have lots of spirit.
  4. Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a ghost?
    A: Wrinkled sheets.
  5. Q: What kind of monster loves to dance?
    A: The boogieman.
  6. Q: What is the largest building in Transylvania?
    A: The Vampire State Building.
  7. Q: Why is it good to tell ghost stories in hot weather?
    A: Because they are so chilling.
  8. Q: What do squirrels say on Halloween?
    A: “Trick or tree.”
  9. Q: What does Tweety Bird say on Halloween?
    A: “Twick or tweet.”
  10. Q: What do diplomats say on Halloween?
    A: “Trick or treaty.”
  11. Q: Where do you go when a ghost is chasing you?
    A: The living room.
  12. Q: How do you make a witch itch?
    A: Take away her W.
  13. Q: What’s a monster’s favorite snack?
    A: Ghoul scout cookies.
  14. Q: Did you hear about the monster with eight arms?
    A: He said they came in handy.
  15. Q: What happened to the guy who couldn’t keep up on the payments to his exorcist?
    A: He was re-possessed.
  16. Q: What is Transylvania?
    A: Dracula’s terror-tory.
  17. Q: Why should a skeleton drink lots of milk?
    A: It’s good for the bones.
  18. Q: Where do zombies go for a swim?
    A: The Dead Sea.
  19. Q: Why can you tell mummies secrets?
    A: They’re good at keeping things under wraps.
  20. Q: How do you get to a monster’s house?
    A: Take a fright at the dead end.
  21. Q: Where does Dracula water ski?
    A: On Lake Eerie.
  22. Q: Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
    A: No body.
  23. Q: What do skeletons say before they start to eat?
    A: “Bone appétit!”
  24. Q: Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
    A: To a day-scare center.
  25. Q: Why are most monsters covered in wrinkles?
    A: Have you ever tried to iron a monster?
  26. Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
    A: His ghoul-friend.
  27. Q: What do ghosts serve for dessert?
    A: Ice scream.
  28. Q: What do witches put in their hair?
    A: Scare spray.
  29. Q: What do you call a haunted chicken?
    A: A poultry-geist.
  30. Q: What kind of mistakes do ghosts make?
    A: Boo boos.
  31. Q: What’s a monster’s favorite play?
    A: Romeo and Ghouliet.
  32. Q: What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
    A: Bamboo.
  33. Q: What would you find on a haunted beach?
    A: A sand witch.
  34. Q: What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty?
    A: Ghoul-Aid.
  35. Q: What is a vampire’s favorite holiday?
    A: Fangsgiving.
  36. Q: What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
    A: It’s a pain in the neck.
  37. Q: What would you get if you crossed a Spaniel, a French poodle, a ghost, and a rooster?
    A: A cocker-poodle-boo!
  38. Q: When do ghosts usually appear?
    A: Just before someone screams.
  39. Q: Why do dragons sleep during the day?
    A: So they can fight knights.
  40. Q: How do you make a strawberry shake?
    A: Sneak up behind it and yell “BOO!”
  41. Q: What do you call an overweight pumpkin?
    A: A plumpkin.
  42. Q: What kind of dog does Dracula have?
    A: A bloodhound.
  43. Q: Where does Count Dracula wash his hair?
    A: In the bat tub.
  44. Q: Why did Count Dracula see his doctor?
    A: He was always coffin.
  45. Q: Why did the vampire run screaming out of the restaurant?
    A: He found out it was a stake house.
  46. Q: Where do you store a werewolf?
    A: In a were-house.
  47. Q: What does a ghost eat for lunch?
    A: A boo-logna sandwich.
  48. Q: What kind of fur do you get from a werewolf?
    A: As fur away as possible.
  49. Q: What should you do when you find a ghost in your living room?
    A: Offer him a sheet.
  50. Q: What should you do with overweight ghosts?
    A: Exorcize them.
  51. Q: How do ghosts get to school in the morning?
    A: They take a ghoul bus.
  52. Q: What do you call a witch who loves the beach but won’t go in the water?
    A: A chicken sand-witch.
  53. Q: What do you do with a green monster?
    A: Wait until he ripens.
  54. Q: What do you do with a blue monster?
    A: Try to cheer him up.
  55. Q: Why don’t monsters eat clowns?
    A: They taste funny.
  56. Q: What do ghost babies wear on their feet?
    A: Boo-tees!
  57. Q: What do you call a nervous witch?
    A: A twitch.
  58. Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
    A: Frostbite.
  59. Q: What do you call a giant monster who lives in the ocean and makes loud noises when he drinks?
    A: A sea slurpant.
  60. Q: What giant monster lives in the mountains and hems men’s suits?
    A: The abominable sew-man.
  61. Q: Why don’t abominable snowmen ever marry?
    A: They always get cold feet.
  62. Q: Why couldn’t the young witch find a job?
    A: She didn’t have enough hex-perience.
  63. Q: Why did the little skeleton feel left out?
    A: He had no body to play with.

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